I wondered how that type of advertising could apply to books-something along the lines of:
Click here to download your copy of Lust in the Courtyard, A fast paced story full of romance and passion set in Regency times.
Warning: This book may cause lack of sleep due to inability to put it down at bedtime. May also cause backup of laundry and dirty dishes. Could be responsible for friction with spouse or children. Could lead to tired eyes, inattention at work, overactive imagination, a full mailbox and a craving for bon bons. If these symptoms continue through more than seven books in a week, please consult a book club professional.
Please discontinue use temporarily if your last communication with your spouse was a request for the telephone number of a divorce lawyer. Avoid use during the last minute planning of your daughter's wedding reception or your son's graduation.
Remember not to exceed the recommended dosage, and if your problems persist, don't you think it's time to start writing them instead?